I am here to bring you the latest in “what the fuck is Suzie so-and-so doing right now?” technology, Twitter. Here’s how the Twitter dudes describe their site: “A global community of friends and strangers answering one simple question: What are you doing? Answer on your phone, IM, or right here on the web!”. So basically, this site fulfills people’s voyeur fantasies. Cool site, huh?!?!
Except that its asinine! If I want you to know what I’m doing, I’ll tell you, either in person or on the phone or whatever. If I want to know what you’re doing, I’ll ask you. Is there anyone out there pretentious enough to believe that the world gives a shit about what they’re doing? And do you really care? I’ll give some examples, to prove my point.
Here’s one of the last messages sent to the site, from some jagoff called “Suro”: “i’ve juts discovered that i had a pair of contact lents at home!! i’ve been waering glasses all these last 7 days xD”. What the FUCK is that garbage? I didn’t clean up his grammar just so you could see the sorts of mouth-breathers who use this thing. Here’s another gem! Someone else is “chewing on gum”.
Dasvedanya “raynerape”! What are you up to? “Едва се вдигам от леглото. Очите ми тежат, сякаш са от олово. Така е, щом до 3 часа стоя и говоря със Султанов за дизайн на комп. игри”
FASCINATING.
Finally, we have “Yvette”, who says: hvn’t had a headache for so long that i’ve forgot how it feels, WHY WHY WHY do u hv to remind me of it?!”
Taken from a thread on the Something Awful forums.
The way it seems to be is human males need to be part peacock, part lion, and part chimpanzee, in their interactions with one another. Part of being a guy is looking pretty, but not SO pretty that guys that are more “lion” single you out. Part of of being a guy is not backing down from a challenge and being able to defend yourself and what you value, but not becoming so rustic and savage that people fear you. While another part of being a guy is being able to joke around, work as a productive member of a unit, and maintain your social structure. – Jabbu
I just think it’s funny, cos he said chimpanzee! Dudes are like birds and other animals. But seriously, I like this explanation for some reason. Dudes need to balance all these aspects of themselves. It kinda reminds me of stats on an RPG character sheet. Some dudes have very high dex, so they always make their saving throws vs. traps and junk. Other dudes do not. But unlike DnD, you can modify your scores pretty easily by just doing shit like reading, taking a shower, and not betraying the trust of your friends.
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Baby, we’ll be fine/ All we’ve gotta do is be brave and be kind
St. Patrick’s day was not St. Pattified to the maxx this year. The hat did not see it’s usual amount of action on Saturday. It remains on the wall in it’s usual spot, relegated to the function of decoration until March 2008. Here is a picture.
I did drink quite a bit of Guinness this year though, so I did my part in the whole “lol i is irsh 2dai” thang.
Interpol are going to play Ottawa in a couple of weeks. You don’t even know how excited I am for this show. I might pee my pants, or have an asthma attack or something. Tony and I are going. It will be good.
Speakin’ of sexah roommates, Uzo the Indomitable surprised me this week with an awesome gift, in the form of a poster of Jack Bauer from 24. Is it finally time to take down the kissin’ ladies and replace them with Jack? Here is an aside, cleverly italicized so that you see that it is different than the body of this message.
ASIDE: In my first year of university, I was living outside of my house, under my OWN roof, sort of. To symbolize this, drunk on power and independ-a-hol, I bought something that I thought my parents wouldn’t approve of. So the poster symbolizes my independence in a really, really immature way. Now, whenever I see ladies kissing, I will think of my immature acting out towards parents who were not even present to see my rebellion. I like to think I’ve grown out of this. /ASIDE
I’m feeling really huggy this week. We’ll see how that goes. If you don’t want a hug, you better stay the fuck out of my way! This is what I like to do. I like to be angrily happy. Fierce in my positive emotiveness. Firefox is telling me that emotiveness is not a word. Strangely enough, it is saying that I may have meant “combativeness”. If you can be “fightin’ mad”, can you be “fightin’ happy”? Let’s work on being “fightin’ happy” everyone. I think this is a positive thing that we should all work towards as friends.
ALSO: if you want a hug, you should probably stay in my way. Touching people is not scary. It is fun, and funny.
Music history lesson: which late 70s punk band is responsible for defining the hardcore sound? If you said “Minor Threat”, you’re partially right. But take a look/listen to Bad Brains. Easily in my top 10 bands of all time.
Artists like Bad Brains, Sister Rosetta Tharpe, and countless other black musicians helped define the music we love and listen to today. I know it’s a bit late for a history lesson (it’s not February anymore), but I thought I’d throw that out there.
I am the product of two individuals: my mama and my dad. I got genes from both of them! That’s a pretty sweet deal if you ask me. Except when they conflict with each other (my genes, not my parents).
My father, who can cut people open, take other people out of them, and sew those people back up, cannot cut a milk bag to save his life. My mother however, ushers in the Renaissance of milk baggery. She is a virtuoso of corner cutting.** Her deft precision in hewing small segments of bag is only matched by her accuracy in shearing off isosceles snippets of plastic. To drink from these bags is to taste ambrosia, to stare Loki in the face and laugh, to know the feeling of slaying the Nemean Lion.
I have inherited both of these traits from my parents. I possess the ability to inspire poets and painters through cutting the milk bag, or to tear the world asunder through my impropriety.
*I am not a scientist
**But not cutting corners! Yeah, you see what I did there
